Why I have been jittery since noon

Yes please.

Cupcakes in thesis seminar make the world a better place.

Cupcakes anwhere make the world a better place.

Cupcakes for breakfast make Ashley nauseous.

worth it.

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Bally’s is my personal savior

(To anyone who bounced over here from marriage confessions: Hi! Apologies for the lack of posts. Read below to see why I have no time for blogging in the past two weeks. Keep checking back, in March I will regain my life. Also, thanks to Katie for answering my question! I might be obsessed with her like she is with Ree. I’ll never admit it in court.)

This thesis writing thing. For lack of a better term (and as a future english teacher I’m always chagrined to lack a better term), it sucks. hard.

Now that I’ve gotten that out there, let me clarify and qualify that statement. I LOVE my thesis topic. I’m writing about female health practitioners during the Massachusetts witchcraft trials of 1650-1700.  These stories still fascinate me, and I still think they deserve to be told.  I know that in a few short weeks I’ll have a piece of scholarship I can be truly proud of. And, fingers crossed, some nifty latin honors to go on my brand spankin new diploma.

Still, writing a thesis is not easy. By any stretch of the imagination.

It's a beautiful day in the Libraryhood

Nor is it always fun.  The night before last, I may have snapped a little. I think the siren song of fun did it. Saturday night I went bowling with friends and the Grumpy Old Man (ie the boyfriend. More on him later.).  Let me tell you how you feel about bowling. I LOVE BOWLING. I love it enough to go all **OMG ALL CAPS INTERNETZ*** on you. I apologize. Bowling requires that kind of devotion. The downside of going bowling was the end of the evening. Grumpy Old Man (GOM) unwittingly set off the avalanche of overwhelming stress by pointing out the amount of work we both needed to do on Sunday.

Let me summarize the next two days for you: I flipped the frick out. There were tears. There was maudlin soft rock music. It was not pretty.

I’m better now. Sort of. I’ll be all the way better in march. For now, I’ve found that going to the gym is the best possible remedy. I funnel my frustration into that treadmill. I tell my flabby butt who’s boss. Then I go to the library and get to work. If this gets me through the next three weeks, I’m all for it. So is my rear. I’m also taking to heart the words of my favorite christmas movie and counting my blessings instead of sheep:

  • I have a world class collection of music. My mood is incredibly responsive to music: a cheerful song is like a drug to me.
  • I seriously love my job. Middle school kids put you in your place.
  • Grumpy Old Man. He may be grumpy, but he also knows how to deal with overwhelmed Ashley: tell me I’m awesome, tell me to buck up, quote Old Greg.
  • I have friends in the same boat.
  • I have friends in an entirely different boat. If I’m on the titanic, they’re pleasure boating in the Caribbean. I can always hitch a ride.
  • In 3-4 months I’ll be in sunny Texas.
  • Katie from Marriage Confessions answered my question. Katie; let’s be friends. K? k. Glad that’s decided.

Props to anyone who got this far. I’m not sure if anyone is out there, I believe it’s entirely possible that I have no readers. Bueller?…. Bueller?

Broadcasting radio nowhere to anyone alive out there,

Ashley

The library has stolen my internet

The library is a dirty dirty scoundrel. It won’t let me onto the internet. I’m writing this from a computer upstairs that will actually connect.

My knee hurts.

My boyfriend hates my chapstick.

I love my chapstick.

Oh hey, Whiny Ashley. Welcome. Now go away.

St. Louis, J’Taime

Things I will miss about St. Louis:

Soulard

WashU Campus

Dewey’s Pizza

Schlafly Beer

Fitz’s Soda

turtle Park

My dear friends

The incredibly selfish college student lifestyle

Things I will not miss:

Snow Mush.  It’s everywhere– pile of trodden down, grey-brown, wet disgusting mush that manages to make its way into your shoes by way of your ankles. Snow mush, begone.

Howdy Pardners

Today,  I should be reading a 200 page dissertation on the Haitian revolution. Or writing a paper on the same subject. Or working on my thesis. Any of these options would be advisable. So whaat am I doing?

I’m starting my blog!!

Let me start here: On January 21st, I became a 2010 teach for america corps member.  I spent the whole day stressing about getting that email, checking my gmail account every hour at work (fueled by my boss who fed my addiction and let me use her computer). Finally, I headed home to change into my gym clothes and go blow off some steam on a treadmill. One last email check before I walked out the door couldn’t hurt, right? And of course, there it was. I never made it to the gym.

So, in a few short months I will be moving back to my home state of Texas, to the Rio Grande Valley. It will be sunny. It will be southern. There will be great mexican and Tejano music. I can’t wait. I was assigned to teach high school english. High school is something I’m incredibly excited and passionate about. Working with high schoolers is always the highlight of my day at work (more about that in a moment), and I really do believe they have an incredible amount to offer the world if you listen well enough. I know it will be a challenge to teach them, but I can’t wait to take that challenge on. Teaching english is something I’m more nervous about. Saying I’m a history major really understates my involvement– I’m a history obsessive. I’ve devoted so much of my time here at WashU to the study of history and the teaching of history.  I was sure I would be assigned to teach history if I got TFA. On the other hand, I’mmore excited than I thought I would be to teach english.  As a writing minor, I’ve definitely been engaging with great literature through college. Moreover, I’m a stickler for a well written essay. My friends come to me when they want their papers worked over by a crazed grammar nerd. So I think teaching english will be a new experience that will make me play to some strengths that I’ve forgotten over the past 4 years.

I’m hoping this blog will be an outlet for frustrations, nerves, and achievements alike over the next two years. I’m looking forward to sharing those two years with you, my non-existent readers! So, to begin:

About Me:

22 year old college student, soon to be teacher!

I work in museum education right now. I live for museums. I love museums.

I am at times annoyingly positive, with a crunchy sarcastic center.

I am super short. This worries me. Most of my students will be far taller.

I’m from El Paso, Texas. and Cincinnati. And St. Louis. and Trinidad. it’s complicated.

I’m writing a senior thesis. It’s taking over my life.

My boyfriend gave me a valentines card with a storm trooper on it. He’s a keeper.

More later, to be sure. For now:  Thesis. See you on the flip side.